That Nine Letter Word.

It has been a while since I have written anything, not because nothing is going on but because of the exact opposite. I feel like I have been on a journey with Jesus.  You know, those times in your life when you say to the Lord, "Really, Lord? I've got nothing left! Nothing!"  Then you repent, asking for forgiveness for doubting His refining ways. I have had many of those and while at the time they were painful and totally not what I would have picked for myself, I wouldn't change it for the world. It's because of those times that I know Jesus more. 

Okay, with that out of the way I have a confession.  These last five months or so God has been putting my blog on my heart.  Gently reminding me of it, speaking to my heart to share..oh, and not to mention that everywhere I went everyone and their mama either mentioned my blog, or their blog, or a blog that they read somewhere.  When the thoughts came into my mind, I just dismissed them (I wish I could do that so easily with all those thoughts that I NEED to take captive!) while telling myself that I didn't really have anything to say and no time to say it, successfully talking myself out of doing what I knew God was telling me to do and not giving a second thought about it.  Which brings me to what I want to share...

Lately this pesky nine letter word keeps popping up everywhere.  In my quiet time, in my devotions, in conversations with friends...heck, God put it on my heart to listen to a podcast a couple of nights ago before I went to sleep and what do you know, the only four sermons available were all about...OBEDIENCE.  I still didn't get it.  I mean, I did  my own inventory of my life and my heart and I would say that I basically was doing what I should be doing.  I couldn't help but laugh as I am writing this because as ridiculous as it sounds, I am just being real.  I began to pray for God to show me where I was not being obedient to what He was asking me to do and here we are today!  Now while I know that my blog is probably not the only thing that God may need to show me about my lack of obedience towards Him and what He has called me to do, it was the first thing and I couldn't deny it anymore.  So here I am, again.  Please be patient with me :)

The biggest lesson that I took away from these past few weeks is that partial obedience is still disobedience.  King Saul had to learn his lesson the hard way.  God called him to destroy Amalek for what he did to Israel and not to spare a thing.  Very straight to the point if you ask me.  However, Saul decided that instead of destroying everything like God said,  he was going to keep the best of the sheep and the oxen back to sacrifice to the Lord (1 Samuel 15).  His disobedience cost him his kingdom.  No matter if it is about a life choice, a circumstance, a reaction or just a blog, when we are not 100% obedient to what God is calling us to do we are being disobedient and we miss out on the amazing things that He has in store for us.