As many times as it takes!

Life is Busy. Everyday there are a thousand different things that pull you in a thousand different directions.  Ministry, church, family, marriage, children, health, jobs, fitness, relationships, friendships, school, overtime, bills...and the list goes on. This seemingly never ending list sometimes causes us to neglect what we need the most above all else, quiet time with the Lord.  

When we do make the time to sit quietly and allow our souls to become filled with His life changing words, our minds become a battle field; fighting to stay fixated on the Giver of life and not allowing ourselves to become consumed with the thoughts of all the things we have going on or have to do.  It is like my mind turns into a radio randomly changing from one station to another or a movie reel playing out my past mistakes and future hopes.  I start to get frustrated but instead of giving up and getting up, I pray...as often as my mind wonders, I pray.

I came across this quote last night by Saint Francis De Sale that says, "If the heart wanders or is distracted, bring it back to the point quite gently and replace it tenderly in it's Masters presence.  And even if you did nothing during the whole of your hour but bring your heart back and place it again in Our Lord's presence, though it went away every time you brought it back, your hour would be well employed."

Sometimes it's easier to stop reading, to get up and begin your "to-do" list.  Don't give up so easy.  Remember that your time spent with the Lord is the best thing that you could ever do for yourself.  Oh, and don't worry about all of the other things, God will work out the rest.

It's Your Choice.

I woke up this morning to the song Banana Pancakes by Jack Johnson.  I rolled out of bed with a huge smile on my face, thanked Jesus for another opportunity and headed out to my Keurig.  Finishing the book of Nehemiah and Esther, I started on the book of Job.  Though I was out of Nehemiah, God continued to put chapter 8 verse 10 in my mind, which says,  "Do not sorrow, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” I thanked the Lord for an amazing reminder and continued my quiet time in Job.

I am going into this assuming that most of us are familiar with the story of Job.  He is described as being blameless and upright, a man who feared the Lord and shunned evil.  With that being said, the Lord allowed him to be tested...and boy was he tested.  He lost everything.  But he didn't react how most of us would.  This is what he did:

²⁰ Then Job arose, tore his robe, and shaved his head; and he fell to the ground and worshiped. ²¹ And he said:

      “ Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
      And naked shall I return there.
      The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away;
      Blessed be the name of the LORD.”
²² In all this Job did not sin nor charge God with wrong.

Wow is right!  I was humbled, especially by the last part "In all this Job did not sin nor charge God with wrong." How quick are we to technically blame the Lord?  We blame Him for not loving enough, not being good enough, not being patient enough, not stepping in soon enough...sad thing is I could go on.  The joy of the Lord was his strength.

As I was getting dressed for work the song The Joy of the Lord was on repeat in my head. I slip on my very cute cardigan from H&M, which I had only worn once for a half of a day mind you and decide to pull out my electric lint brush to remove some lint from the sleeve. That sucker ate my sleeve!!  Okay, I am exaggerating but it did put a hole in it the size of a half dollar making it unwearable.   Right at that moment, the Lord asked me, "So are you going to keep singing? Will you choose joy?"  I am not even going to front, this event would normally have ruined my morning..but instead of letting it, I chose to keep singing as I tossed my sweater in the trash.  Now look, I know a ruined sweater doesn't compare to a lot of things, but God knows exactly what I need to get His amazing point across to me and in the process show me my own heart.  

To keep singing in the midst of it all, whatever it is, is a choice.

Don't Stop The Fight!

There are times in our walks when we become tired.  Seasons that the Lord has led us to, though for our own good, seem never-ending. Prayers repeated on the daily that we have grudgingly come to accept that there might be a small possibility that they could be falling on deaf ears.  Thoughts become consumed with the issues at hand and fears start to set in. The strength to fight off the over-looming enemy that seeks to destroy you is failing.  Then those tiny seeds of discord, discouragement and discontentment implanted by Satan grow, causing you to question and doubt the One who created a plan for you before you were even thought of.  We all grow weary at times.

But then the Lord reminds us of the truths in His sweet Word...


"And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart." 
-Galatians 6:9


"Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it." -Matthew 10:39


"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." -Proverbs 3:5-6 


"For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." -Romans 8:38&39


"...being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." -Philippians 1:6


"Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him.." -Psalm 37:7


"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." -Jeremiah 29:11


"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us..." -Ephesians 3:20


"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." -Romans 8:28


Then you remember why you have kept fighting up to this point.  You remember why you continue to read and pray even though you may not feel anything or nothing seems to be changing.  You remember how He has always been faithful to you and has never let you down, how He has always provided a way out for you. He reminds you of how His thoughts and ways are higher than yours and how there is a purpose for everything under heaven.  He reminds you of how He parted the Red Sea and raised from the dead. You remember why you love Him and you keep on fighting.

Imagine Yourself Here...

Sometimes you just need a mental break...

 Your Welcome.                                                               

I love a good quote!  Now that I admitted that, I feel that I also have to admit that I borrowed this from friend :)
Her name is Jessica & she writes seriouslygod...check her out!

“Your journey has molded you for your greater good, and it was exactly what it needed to be. Don't think that you've lost time. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the now, and now is right on time.” 

― Asha Tyson

 Sweet, huh?!

Be Blessed.

”

So Do You Really Believe It? Do You?

Last night during a sweet worship service we sung Your Love Never Fails.  The words at the very end of the song sing "You make all things work together for my good" and usually whoever is leading worship continues singing that sentence over and over.  As I was singing along, hands raised to my God with what I perceived to be my whole heart, He ever so gently asked me,"But Tamara, do you really believe it?" My heart started to race and my eyes started to tear as I answered Him as honest and raw as I possibly could at that very moment...

"Sometimes, Lord."

Let's face it. Sometimes life sucks.  Isn't it easier to trust that God is better able to use the less complicated things in our life for His good then the more complex things?  I look at the events of my life thus far, some really good and some not so much.  But no matter the outcome, I can now look back and see God in them all.  Don't get it twisted.  My circumstances may not have changed, I still had to go through the trial, I went through the stages of grief, I went through the hurt and the wondering why. Whether it was Him allowing my car to break down so that I could witness to the tow truck driver or for my Grandma to be taken by such a destroying disease so that those around her could see her peace and joy in the midst of the pain of death, He used it for His good.

God says that ALL things...not some, not just the easy stuff, not just the pretty things. All things.

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." -Romans 8:28


Oh, here is the song..

And It Goes A Little Something Like This!

In my head, it goes a little something like this:

God is sitting in heaven looking down on me.  He turns to the angels that are all around Him and says, "Just twenty-six more days!  Twenty-six more days until she understands!"  With glee, He smiles down at me.  This same thing happens everyday as He is counting down the days to my understanding.  "Thirteen more days!" "Six more days you guys!", "Tomorrow is the day!" Then finally the day comes!  He throws the biggest shindig and invites only His closest friends.  They all watch the big screen as the light bulb goes off in my head and I finally understand what the Lord has been trying to show me!  I smile a smile of relief, I breathe a sigh of freedom as I proclaim " I get it now!"  Little did I realize what my Jesus had up His sleeves this whole time.  He has been lining up the divine appointments, the sweet words of wisdom from friends, even the little nuggets in my quiet time all for this moment.  All for the perfect time that my heart would be at a place to receive what He needed me to understand.  He did it all for me.

God's patience with me blows my mind, because frankly, I would have given up on myself a long time ago.  The thought of it humbles me.  It not only shows His divine sovereignty over the affairs of my life but also His immeasurable, unconditional love for me.  I pray that I would have that same patience for myself, that same pursuing, loving, gentle patience for you.

God knows exactly what we need AND when we will be at that perfect place to receive it.  That is just how ah-mazing our God is!

His Stamp Of Approval!

"Hi...uh, my name is Tamara and I am a head tripper."

"HI TAMARA!"

For those of you who do not know what I mean, here is the Urban Dictionary definition:

Head Trip

(noun) Something that you dwell on for a long period of time. Often an irrational fear or the reaction to Satan psyching you out. (It really said someone but I changed it to Satan)

With that being said, I feel the need to tell you that I do not always head trip.  There are circumstances in my life in which one would think that a head trip is in order, but God's peace has always proven itself to me during those times.  However, writing this blog has had me on edge. Here are the three main reasons why:

1.  I don't feel qualified.

2.  As I write what is on my heart, I make myself vulnerable. 

3.  I never really know if anyone is reading it or even being encouraged by it.

As I mulled these thoughts over and over...and over in my head.  I got the brilliant idea of calling a friend to ask her what she thought of my last post.  It has been the hardest for me to write because it is so close to home (going back to #2 on my list).  I figured that if I just got a little word of encouragement or some positive reinforcement than I could be sure that I am doing okay, that my posts have been okay...Well, God had a different idea.

He ever so gently called me out. "I have called you to do this so why are seeking the approval of a man, when I have already approved you? You are already approved."  Oh, no words.  Then He gave me this visual:

Whoever is reading this, I want you to know that you too are already approved.  God has called you by name. You are His. 

"Why live for the approval of men when you can have the approval of their Creator? What can they give you that God can't? -Lecrae

Damaged Goods.

For a long time, this is exactly how I saw myself.  Just like this box.  A beat up package with strategically placed fragile stickers to protect and taped up in spots to keep from falling apart. Many experiences led me to this unfortunate conclusion, those that I had no control over.  As a little girl, I learned to allow the actions of others towards me to define who I was and how I saw myself, I learned to take the things that were said to me in anger to heart, believing their truth.  I also learned to let the rejection I experienced in my life to go before me and lay out a path to define my self-worth.  The enemy of my soul took every opportunity to create foot holds in my young, vulnerable mind that he hoped would haunt me continuously, causing me to forever be indebted to the lies that only he could spew.  It worked and for a long time, it became normal to me.  I saw myself through the eyes of the  lies.  Defined myself through the shouts of untruths.  Accepted that every rejection, failure, heartache was some how my fault.  If only I had given a little more, if only I had looked a certain way, acted differently...if only.

BUT GOD. (Oh, how I love that...)

God had a bigger plan for me!  He daily fights my lies with the truth of His word, He continuously teaches me who I am in Him while cementing in my heart His unconditional love and devotion to me. He daily shows me the beauty in which I was created, to be used for His glory.  Because of what I have been brought through, I can confidently look at His little girl and proclaim to her that she is loved and that she is worth it to Him. I would not be who I am today, if it weren't for my yesterday.

Hurt comes in many different forms.  Hastily spoken words, broken life long covenants that were meant to be forever, broken promises or even bruises and broken bones.  But what the enemy has intended for evil, our God promises to use it for good! (Rom 8:28)  He loves you! Trust Him with your pain, let Him restore, rebuild and heal.  Most importantly, let Him use it to glorify His name!